I normally post on Green Chip, but a recent trip has broader appeal.
Since my wife is a socially active bisexual we invited nine of her bisexual/lesbian girlfriends plus one husband to Vegas. The women circulated ribald e-mails in eager anticipation. One of them even wrote we could fondle her girlfriend for a comped room. I inquired what liberties we could take for a suite at Bellagio!
In case your fanatasies mislead you, the group ranged from gorgeous "Howard Stern" bisexuals to plain "gym teacher" lesbians. Watch the overwhelmingly female audience at any Melissa Etheridge concert if you don't understand. Strip casinos kindly comped our rooms and a topless cabana pool party. Yes, some Vegas pools are topless. I heard they go unofficially nude during the Adult Video Entertainment convention because security has bigger problems. Anyway, the gathering was pleasant and relaxing. One of my friends is a headlining magician on the strip. He stopped by our cabana to hang out and show us a few tricks. Many advantage players have a sleight-of-hand background, but Vegas magicians oddly don't gamble.
Here is a tip: you can't control friends in Vegas. They foolishly stayed up all night and exhausted themselves trying to do everything in one weekend. I merely distracted them for a day by the pool and steered them towards economical blackjack, craps, and video poker. They were so fatiqued they alternated laughing and dozing during Stephen Wright's comedy show. Then they ran around casinos searching for craps and going nuts at whack-a-mole. You know, it's tough to get an advantage at this arcade game, but you can't lose much money either. Maybe Stanford will publish "Professional Whack-a-Mole".
Out of boredome I drifted off to scout blackjack and exact revenge for detention of a Green Chip friend. My male friend followed but didn't completely appreciate why I wanted to "saunter" around. Unfortunately for him I jumped into a shoe and multiplied my buy-in by ten. My friend was hooked and exclaimed "That's enough for my outdoor deck!". I dragged him away to get on mailing lists with brief high-denomination video poker. In a few hands I hit a tax-form jackpot. My friend was suitably impressed, but still blackjack-obsessed. He dragged me back to his hotel to supervise his low-limit blackjack game and I won yet another shoe. After my friend surrendered a $10 hand, the floor manager saw the single red chip and warned the remaining "bet" fell short of the minimum. My friend amusingly worried about this "heat". Finally his wife met us so I could sleep!
The next day I volunteered money but he balked at betting black chips! He finally agreed to try the great game at Barbary Coast. He sat and immediately expressed confusion about "upside down cards" because he didn't know how to play handheld! With help from the dealer and a strategy card he approximated basic strategy. The rest was hard to believe. The floor manager pushed back his chips and refused all further action on the second bet raise! My friend then cemented his skill-free reputation by tipping the dealer and going next door to "practice counting" at 6:5 single deck "blackjack". Of course he didn't appreciate it would be cheaper to "practice" on a shoe game or laptop computer.
We later went to a sportsbook and they accepted the womens' action while refusing my male friend's . By this time he was tired of heat and argued unsuccessfully with the clerk. The poor guy saw me win while he lost and got all the heat everywhere!
On the last day the women pooled money for a little video poker. You see, many are poor teachers and artists with limited gambling funds. When they hit a jackpot for $650 they squealed so loud they attracted a crowd who thought they hit Megabucks. Overall it was a fun, winning, and quite economical trip. My wife is starting to like video poker waaaay too much though. I'll need to either cut back on blackjack or pay for excursions to keep her away from those high-denomination machines.
